recovered notebook

unearthed in a massive room-cleaning crusade: one small green notebook, previously presumed dead, documenting my most recent summer's travels. found inside (below): covertly executed pen sketches of some of the disheveled characters occupying the zoo-like waiting room of a Barcelona Hospital where I sat for five hours awaiting treatment. never in my days have i seen such carnage! women with their eyes rolling in their heads praying to Jesús, ancient men with skin like cracked earth holding their heads in their withered hands, shaking and sobbing-- in the "back hallway," a pale, pudding-like woman rolling on her back howling like a vengeful ghost, another missing both her legs wheeled in on blood-soaked cotton sheets. never in my days.

I Don't Know What is Going on Here...

...but I'm pretty sure it's CRAZY.


Foucault's panopticon
http://cartome.org/panopticon1.htm
"Hence the major effect of the Panopticon: to induce in the inmate a state of conscious and permanent visibility that assures the automatic functioning of power. So to arrange things that the surveillance is permanent in its effects, even if it is discontinuous in its action; that the perfection of power should tend to render its actual exercise unnecessary; that this architectural apparatus should be a machine for creating and sustaining a power relation independent of the person who exercises it; in short, that the inmates should be caught up in a power situation of which they are themselves the bearers."


Double Slit Experiment:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovytOBSKV8U
"The electron decided to act differently, as though it were aware that it was being watched"


Sartre's Power of the Gaze:
http://thomaslcummins.tripod.com/id124.html
"In my solitude, I rule the space around me but when my environment is intruded upon by another person I have to share it with this Other in an indeterminate manner. The freedom of the Other destabilizes my own freedom and disintegrates the preconceptions I had previously existed in. As a human being, I naturally tend to objectify the world around me but I must also presume that the Other also objectifies the world as well, including me in it. I have now become an object in the Other's vision and, because I realize this innately, I have become an object even in my own opinion. I am imprisoned in the Other's vision and, therefore, pass judgment on myself as a mere object. This causes a shameful feeling similar to if you were to spy through a keyhole and became surprised to see another eyeball staring back at you."


As soon as your back is turned, all your toys come to life.


WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?



...

This is the first and currently only installment of a project inspired by my comprehensive body of creative work from age two to five--by far the most prolific years of my life. Primarily consisting of crayolas on paper, these masterpieces boldly address some of the paramount social issues of our time, from three-legged unicorns to the exploitation of demented dog-men in the custodial services.

Hundreds of these drawings have been preserved in a moldy cardboard box in my mother's closet. I'm now embarking on the task of translating them into large paintings, since my shriveled old brain (like the discarded rind of a juiced orange) is no longer capable of the genius my 2-year-old self was.

An Advisable Way to Warm Up Yer Belly on a Frigid Winter Solstice Night

Happy solstice, little wanderers. What are you looking for?
If it's the best vegan chili this side of Kentucky (probably anywhere, really, since there are no vegans in Kentucky), you've come to the right place. I made a pot of this madness last night along with twice baked potatoes* to much critical acclaim from my carnivorous family.

"I can't believe there's not steak in my mouth right now" Chili

Ingredients:
1 Tbsp olive oil
1 onion, chopped
1/2 red bell pepper, chopped
1 clove garlic, minced
28 oz. crushed tomatoes
19 oz. vegetable broth
1 Tbsp chili powder
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp sugar
1/2 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
15 oz. kidney beans, drained
15 oz. pinto beans, drained
1/2 cup corn (fresh if available, but frozen is perfectly acceptable)

Directions:
1. Heat oil in a large pot. Add onion, bell pepper, and garlic and sauté until slightly browned.
2. Add all remaining ingredients except for beans and corn. Bring to a boil; reduce heat and simmer uncovered for 15 minutes, stirring occasionally. The chili will appear very watery at first, but do not be alarmed! It will boil down.
3. Add beans. Simmer for another 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add corn and simmer for a final 10 minutes, or until desired thickness is achieved. Serve atop potato, topped with shredded vegan cheese or better-than-sour cream, if desired.



*Twice Baked Potatoes*

Ingredients:
2 large baked potatoes
2 Tbsp soy creamer
2 Tbsp Earth Balance margarine
1 clove garlic, minced
1/2 tsp salt
Fresh chives for garnish

Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 350
2. Scoop out the insides of the baked potatoes with a spoon, leaving the skins intact to create shells. In a large bowl, combine the potato with all other ingredients except for chives. Blend with an electric mixer until smooth and creamy, adding more creamer if necessary.
3. Spoon the potato mixture back into the skins. Place on a baking tray and cook at 350 for 10 minutes or until the tops are lightly browned.